How do we connect the dots that shape our understanding of love and relationships as we grow up?
It was 2001, and my roommates and I were finishing our lunch at a summer camp in the Sierra Nevadas of California. The counselors passed around a hat filled with small pieces of paper. Each contained the name of a different camper.
Whoever's name we drew would become our secret friend. Throughout the week, we would give gifts to that person, delivered by our choice of being designated as the Secret Secret Messenger. At the closing campfire, the campers would reveal their identities, bestow a final gift, and a hug from their secret friend to be witnessed by everyone.
My eleven-year-old self loved the idea of secretly liking someone. She hoped the name on her paper would belong to a cutie. The hat made its rounds, coming to our table as my friends and I finished our mixed green salad . In my hand, a name came out.
Curtis Simon.
"Do you know who this is?" I asked my roommate Denise. She pointed to a table of pre-teen boys, across from the counselors to our right.