Family pressure: The choices of eighteen, the shadow of adulthood
In the decision-making process of filling out college applications, families often play a crucial role. For many Chinese families, the college entrance examination is not just a test for the child, but a battle for the entire family. Parents' expectations, elders' experiences, and even the family's financial situation subtly permeate every word on the application form. Many students feel not a sense of free choice when filling out their applications, but rather a kind of invisible constraint. For example, parents might say, “Studying medicine is stable; doctors will never be unemployed,” “Computer science is popular now, with high salaries,” or “There’s no future in the humanities; choose a science or engineering major.” These suggestions seem rational but often overlook the child's interests and personality.
Take Xiaolin as an example; he is a boy who loves literature and history, dreaming of becoming a journalist or a writer. However, under strong family advice, he chose computer science because “this major has prospects.” After entering university, he found himself completely uninterested in programming, feeling unprecedented frustration in the face of obscure code and algorithms. Xiaolin's experience is not an isolated case. Many students, under family expectations, choose what their parents see as “safe” or “popular” majors, only to find themselves at odds with their chosen field in their daily studies. This compromise in choice often stems from a vague self-awareness at eighteen and an excessive reliance on parental opinions.
The root of family pressure lies not only in parents' concerns for their children's future but also in society's singular definition of “success.” In the eyes of many families, a good major means a high-paying job, social status, and a stable life. However, this definition often neglects individual uniqueness. Parents' advice may come from good intentions but can prematurely confine young people to an unsuitable path before they even understand themselves.
Self-doubt: The struggle between an unsuitable major and inner conflict
After entering university, the discomfort of major choice gradually became apparent. For those students who realize they have “chosen the wrong major,” the psychological struggle often weighs heavier than academic pressure. They begin to question their abilities, interests, and even their entire life direction. Xiaolin often feels lost in computer science classes; he not only struggles to understand the course content but also feels out of place among classmates who are passionate about programming. He starts to ask himself, “Am I not working hard enough, or am I simply not suited for this major?” This self-doubt is like a seed, taking root and sprouting in the dormitory at night.
Another characteristic of university life is the increased freedom, which allows students more time to reflect on their choices. Unlike the packed schedules of high school, university offers young people more autonomy, but it also brings greater psychological burdens. Some students feel overwhelmed in their major courses while discovering their interests in extracurricular activities. For instance, Xiaolin found joy in writing again while participating in the school's literary club. He discovered through club activities that he is better at expressing thoughts through words rather than solving problems with code. However, this realization did not bring him relief; instead, it intensified his inner conflict: should he continue to stick with a major he dislikes but is “promising,” or take the risk of shifting to an uncertain direction?
The core of this self-doubt lies in young people's fear of “failure.” They worry that changing majors will waste time, that deviating from popular majors will lead to a loss of competitiveness, and even that they will disappoint their parents. In the early stages of university, this psychological burden is particularly heavy, as at eighteen, they have just begun to face life choices independently but lack sufficient experience to cope with uncertainty. They fear that “choosing wrong” is not just a mistake but a denial of their own abilities.
Future planning: Major does not equal life’s destiny
Although the experience of “choosing the wrong major” is painful, it also provides young people with an opportunity to re-examine themselves. The university campus is not only a place for academics but also a stage for self-exploration and future planning. More and more students are beginning to realize that choosing a major is not the end of life but a starting point that can be adjusted.
Firstly, universities offer various ways to compensate for the discomfort of major choice. For example, many schools allow students to minor in other subjects or take interdisciplinary courses. Xiaolin's experience in the literary club led him to start taking courses in journalism and creative writing, which not only rekindled his interest but also opened new possibilities for his future career planning. Additionally, club activities, internship experiences, and off-campus projects provide students with opportunities to explore different fields. Through these practices, students can gradually discover their true interests and accumulate experience for future career development.
Secondly, society's obsession with “matching majors” is gradually loosening. In today’s job market, many industries no longer limit their hiring standards to professional backgrounds. The rise of the internet industry, the increase in interdisciplinary careers, and the popularity of lifelong learning have made the notion that “majors determine fate” outdated. Many successful professionals do not strictly follow the paths of their university majors. For instance, a student who studied finance may ultimately become an excellent advertising planner, while an engineering graduate may transition into the education sector. These cases illustrate that a major is just a part of life, not the whole.
More importantly, the “wrong” choices made during university are themselves a valuable growth experience. In facing the challenges of an unsuitable major, students learn how to cope with setbacks, re-plan their goals, and seek direction amid uncertainty. These skills lay a foundation for future life that is more significant than any single major course. The signature of eighteen, seemingly a decisive choice, is actually just a node in a long life. True growth occurs in the process of continuous trial and error, adjustment, and breakthrough.
The possibility of loosening: From choice to acceptance
The experience of “choosing the wrong major” appears to be a mistake, but in reality, it is an awakening of self-awareness. It prompts young people to start thinking: What do I truly want? What am I good at? The answers to these questions are often not found at the time of filling out applications but gradually emerge during the four years of university exploration. Family pressure, self-doubt, and confusion about the future are all inevitable stages in this process. However, it is precisely these struggles that drive young people from passive acceptance to active choice.
For those students who are anxious about “choosing the wrong major,” the university campus is a place full of possibilities. It not only provides academic resources but also offers opportunities to observe life, build relationships, and understand oneself. The discomfort of major choice is precisely a door to a broader life. Through trying, reflecting, and adjusting, young people can gradually find their own direction. The signature of eighteen is just the beginning of the story, not the end. At this starting point, every “mistake” is a possibility for loosening, pointing towards a more authentic self and a more open future.