Chapter 1: The Origin and Development of Childhood Discrimination

From a developmental psychology perspective, discriminatory behavior is actually a natural stage in human cognitive development. Professor Andreas Beelmann, head of the Department of Psychology at Friedrich Schiller University in Germany, pointed out: "Children begin to feel superior to their own gender when they are about three to four years old, and then develop to feel superior to their own race or ethnicity. This is normal in the process of personality formation."

Behind this "sorting" behavior is children's psychological need to establish self-identity. Children identify their place in social groups by dividing the world into "us" and "them." Research shows that the development of prejudice increases in children during preschool years and peaks between the ages of five and seven. As age continues to increase, this process reverses, and prejudice begins to decrease.

Cognitive simplification is also an important reason for discrimination. Children, whose brains are not fully developed, tend to use simple categories to understand a complex world. Classifying people into "fat people", "thin people", "beautiful people", "ugly people", "eugenics" and "poor students" is as simple and clear as classifying toys. This cognitive simplification helps children reduce uncertainty in the world, but it also provides the ground for discrimination.

What's more, discriminatory behavior in children is often imitated in the adult world. Children are not born with the knowledge that "fat is ugly" and "poor grades are shameful". Most of these values ​​are learned from parents, the media and society. One study found that 62% of children's prejudice against body shape came directly from their parents' comments; 45% of children's discriminatory attitudes towards academics came from unintentional comparisons made by teachers.

Chapter 2: The psychological motivations of bullies

Bullying is far from a simple "bad boy bullying a good boy"; there is a complex psychological mechanism behind it. According to the analysis of Professor Ma Ai, director of the Criminal Psychology Research Center of China University of Political Science and Law, there are four typical causes of campus bullying: emotional bullying, attitudinal bullying (discrimination, looking down on the weak), demand-based bullying (such as asking for property) and small group bullying (herding behavior).

Gaining a sense of power and control is one of the core motivations for bullying. Bullies gain a sense of superiority and control by discriminating and bullying "others." In his research, Salmivali found that school bullies usually have the following psychological characteristics: they believe that they are born dominant; they believe that they are in a dominant position in the entire group; they believe that others in the group desire to be dominated by them.

Deflecting one's own pain is another important motivation. Many bullies themselves are experiencing various forms of pain—family problems, academic pressure, confusion about their identity. By bullying others, they draw attention away from their own pain. Teacher Li Di, a senior lecturer at Moral Education in Henan Province, pointed out: "Many children's aggressive behavior may actually be a distress signal sent by them, but as adults, we have never understood it."

Small group identification and pressure to conform cannot be ignored either. In a small group, some children will follow the herd. Maybe they have no intention of bullying others, but the "leader" or others in the small group make bullying requests. In order to gain recognition and acceptance from the small group, the child will actively do it.

It is worth noting that bullies often have significant prejudices, such as looking down on others, discriminating against others' appearance, etc. From the perspective of psychological traits, they are also very likely to have high self-esteem (worrying about face), high narcissism (I am the most unique) and a strong self-centered tendency (I am justice).

Chapter 3: The psychological trauma of the bullied

The psychological reactions of those who are bullied are equally complex and diverse. The most common is internalized discrimination—transforming external discrimination into self-discrimination. Those who are often denied, "must not be mentally healthy, must have very low self-esteem inside, and must be very cowardly in their behavior."

This kind of internalized discrimination forms a vicious cycle: in order to protect yourself, you use a cowardly appearance to protect yourself, that is, don't cause trouble, make less trouble, try to please the people around you, don't say or do anything, and use a cowardly attitude to protect yourself from being bullied. This withdrawal behavior actually reinforces the bully's belief that the target is "bullyable," thereby intensifying the bullying behavior.

Perceived discrimination has a profound impact on the bullied. The study found that although left-behind children are relatively less likely to attribute discrimination to group identity, they still feel more discrimination in their daily lives than non-left-behind children, and it is characterized by universality and stability.

This kind of discriminatory perception leads to emotional loneliness, depression, reduced life satisfaction, introversion and avoidance in interpersonal communication, and the fear of putting forward one's own opinions. In terms of behavior, it is easier to adopt negative coping methods such as self-blame and rationalization, and even self-injury and suicidal behaviors.

What is even more heartbreaking is that some bullied people will deflect their pain by discriminating against weaker people in an attempt to improve their own status. This is why sometimes there is the complication that the bullied becomes the bully. A student who had been bullied recalled: "When I finally found a target who was weaker than me, I almost couldn't wait to join in bullying him-as if this could wash away my own shame."

Chapter 4: The vicious cycle of discrimination and bullying

Discrimination and bullying are difficult to eradicate because they form a self-reinforcing system of multiple feedback loops.

The social identity reinforcement cycle is one of them: the bully strengthens his position in the group by discriminating against "others"; the bullied comply out of fear; bystanders remain silent or join in because they are afraid of becoming the next target. This makes bullying increasingly difficult to challenge.

The cognitive bias confirmation cycle also exacerbates this phenomenon: once someone is labeled as "fat" or "a poor student", people will pay more attention to behaviors that match the label and ignore behaviors that do not fit the label. This is the confirmation bias in psychology. A child labeled as a "poor student" may be attributed occasional good results to "luck" rather than ability.

The perpetuating cycle of power asymmetry cannot be ignored either: bullies gain more social power and influence through bullying, which makes it easier for them to continue bullying; while the bullied are increasingly unable to resist, because not only are they bullied, but they may also suffer more serious retaliation for trying to resist.

The most important is the spiral of silence effect: as bullying continues, more and more people choose to remain silent for fear of being targeted, which makes the bullying appear to be tacitly tolerated and further encourages the bully.

Chapter 5: Intervention strategies and psychological reconstruction

Breaking the vicious cycle of discrimination and bullying requires multi-level intervention strategies. From an individual psychological level, the key is to help children establish a healthy self-identity and sense of value. Parents can mitigate the harm caused by sexism and the like by building their children's self-esteem, social skills and encouraging them to express themselves.

For those who are bullied, timely intervention and psychological support are crucial. Parents should pay attention to abnormalities in their children, such as behavioral abnormalities (sudden refusal to communicate), physical abnormalities (covering body parts), and emotional abnormalities (sullenness). Establish effective communication channels, talk to children on an equal footing for at least 10 minutes every day, and focus on emotional communication instead of just focusing on academics.

From the perspective of educational environment, schools should give full play to the dual effects of subject education and activity education, cultivate students' empathy and sense of responsibility, and eliminate the psychological foundation for bullying behavior. Mental health education classes can be held and some group activities can be conducted to allow children to strengthen communication and learn correct expressions.

It is more important to establish anti-bullying systems. Minors themselves are a vulnerable group and should not blindly fight alone without adequate preparation. A common anti-bullying system within the school can be established. When bullying is discovered, students can write letters, report to teachers, etc., which not only ensures their own safety, but also effectively helps the bullied.

At a socio-cultural level, we need to challenge social norms and cultural narratives that encourage discrimination and bullying. The media should avoid reinforcing stereotypes, and parents and teachers need to reflect on the discriminatory attitudes they may be transmitting.

Conclusion: Toward a future of tolerance and understanding

Discrimination and bullying are not inevitable human nature, but the product of the interaction between specific psychological processes and the social environment. Beginning in childhood, when we discriminate against “others” and engage in bullying, we are essentially trying to establish our own identity, seek social belonging, and gain a sense of control—but these attempts take the wrong form.

The key to truly solving the problem is not to simply punish the bully or protect the bullied, but to reshape the entire social environment so that every child can find a healthy way of self-identity and a sense of social belonging. This requires the joint efforts of families, schools and society.

As German psychologist Professor Beelmann pointed out: "People who have in-depth contact with different ethnic groups are less likely to generalize about others, let alone discriminate against others."

When we encourage children to engage with and understand people of different backgrounds and characteristics, when we cultivate children’s empathy and critical thinking, and when we challenge our own biases and assumptions, we are laying the foundation for a more inclusive society.

Every child should believe that his or her value lies not in conforming to a certain standard but in being a unique individual. Fat or thin, beautiful or ugly, good or bad grades - these external labels should never define a person's value and dignity.

When we learn to see the person behind the label, when we are able to embrace the imperfections in ourselves and others, when we have the courage to speak out for those who are discriminated against - we are breaking the cycle of discrimination and bullying and creating a world where everyone can grow freely.

In this world, there are no "others", only different and unique individuals; there is no discrimination and bullying, only understanding and respect. This may be an ideal, but it is this ideal that guides us to keep moving forward and keep getting better.