Before and after abortion, every morning from 2 am to 3 am (that is, the eve of the five -day day), I always wake up because of various strange reasons -constipation, uncomfortable anorexia, itchy all over the body, and even hitting ghosts!
Have you heard that "the king wants you to die three more, can't stay to the five more?" In ancient times, the five -day day was the intersection of the time of the yin and yang realm!
Therefore, I think that getting up in five days is a sign of miscarriage, and the dead child comes back to do goodbye to me.
In addition, the child's pregnant and flowing time coincides with the time of his grandfather's life: when I was found to be pregnant, my body was cold and her face was pale. He was his 93rd birthday again. He was almost sent to the intensive care unit; when I was found to be found in the morning on the day of the fetus, my grandfather's attending doctor suddenly called his mother and asked his mother to buy propylecoplin needle (renewal needle), Continue for the foreign public!
In addition, his grandfather has a deep -rooted feudal concept. He always prefers the inner grandson. In his eyes, his mother and I are a foreign name, so it is difficult for me to get sincere feelings in him.
There is a saying that "grandson does not go to the grave of the grandfather" -the old family taboo foreign surnames on their own grave. Generally, the grandson will not allow grandson to sweep the grave to the grave, unless the grandfather's family does have a long time. The ancients believed that grandson sweeping the grave to the grandfather laughed at the foreign house in disguise.
Therefore, in combination with the experience before and after abortion and my grandfather's own belief, I decided not to attend the funeral of the grandfather.
Two weeks before abortion, I hit a ghost!
Due to sufficient rest in early pregnancy, I spent most of my daily time in bed, and the rhythm of life almost became a cycle of eating and sleeping. However, such a lifestyle led me to lack enough exercise. Within a week, I suffered a problem with difficult bowel movements.
In the face of this problem, I could have chosen squatting defecation, but considering that the fetal development is not yet stable, I worry that the movement when squatting may squeeze the fetus and affect its oxygen supply. Therefore, I chose to stand in a way to stand and defecate. After all, I am an individual, not a beast!
In the pregnant mother APP, I learned that expectant mothers in the third trimester usually use toilet to defecate, which is convenient and safe. In order to ensure my health of myself and the fetus, I quickly bought a toilet on Taobao and chose a shop that was shipped closer to my house.
Although the delivery place of the toilet is in Guangzhou, it still takes two to three days to get it according to the normal logistics procedures. However, the demand for bowel movements is not reduced due to waiting -at that time, I often drive back and forth between bed and toilet. What's more serious is that over time, the strong intention even awakened me even at two or three in the morning.
Finally, at noon on the third day, I learned that the toilet would be delivered on the same day. So, I was waiting in the toilet, while paying attention to logistics information, and continued to defecate in a standing manner. However, it is frustrating that the delivery will not be delivered until the evening. In the face of this unchanged fact, although I am dissatisfied, I can't urge or complain. After all, the courier company has not made mistakes. They are just operating according to the normal process.
In the process of waiting, I stomped my feet, and couldn't help expressing dissatisfaction with the slow sendson of the courier. However, when the anger erupted from my mouth, I felt more irritable and uneasy. "Why is pregnancy so painful? Who do I get?" Driven by such emotions, I couldn't help patting my belly with my hands. But then, I realized my disappointment -after all, I was a mother and the child was innocent. I should not vent my emotions on him.
Until the toilet was delivered safely, I was finally relieved, and my mood was a little easier. However, for the next three nights, whenever I closed my eyes and prepared to enter the dreamland, my mind flashed a variety of strange pictures like a movie: on the first night, I dreamed of a smile full of smiles. Cute baby, the dimples on the small face seem to be able to install the sweetness of the world; the next night, the baby shakes into a zombie, his head is sticky, as disgusting as the surface of the swamp. , Showing my mouth full of teeth, grinning at my teeth, scaring my soul to fly; on the third night, there were three cyan ghosts behind the zombies. Waiting for a mysterious ritual.
In the next time, I had symptoms of backache. With the torture of previous pregnancy, I began to have a strong resistance. I can't help questioning, does the pregnant mother have the right to rest? Why always take the needs of children first? Driven by such emotions, I took out the waist pad, turned on the heating switch, and adjusted the temperature to the middle range to try to relieve the soreness of the waist. Despite the use of hot waist pads, the temperature with a high cushion may cause fetal malformation.
However, strangely, the heating switch of the waist pad was automatically closed after a few minutes. I was caught in contemplation. Is this a child passing me a certain information and expressing its dissatisfaction and resistance? Or is it that a bad thing will happen soon?
I tried repeated operations multiple times, but the result was still the same. In the face of this situation, I finally chose to give up the waist pad. Because I know that children's life is so fragile and precious, I don't want to bring any potential harm to it because of my willfulness.
(The heating device of the waist pads has always been able to operate normally. This time the failure is the only time. Since then, I have been idle for half a year. When it is used again, it is miraculously "resurrected" -the normal start and regular shutdown. .
Her husband has a soft spot for Daojia culture. He has read the Book of Changes roughly, and he will dot the ability to measure the word. I wrote a word in his palm naughty, trying to test whether the baby could be born safely.
I wrote the word "in", and he suddenly fell into thought, and he didn't say anything for a long time.
In the end, he spoke gently: "This' in 'the word', adding a horizontal hook to become the word of '." We usually say that pregnancy is not'. "
Then, he closed his eyes, closed his hands, and showed a mysterious expression on his face, as if communicating with the gods between the heavens and the earth: "Remember, the emotions must be stable, do not move the anger and sorrow, once the mentality is unstable, the fetal gas will also be qi will also be. Affected, the baby may be dangerous ... "Although his voice was small, I heard it clearly when I was sitting beside him.
"What are you talking about?!" I couldn't help asking him. Seeing that I was so nervous, he changed his mouth and said, "Well, after noon next Wednesday, you go to the hospital for review, and there will be good news. Also, there may be some twists and turns in the fourth month of pregnancy. Be careful when you go out. "
My husband's words are contradictory, making me even more unable to relax. However, only the fetus survives can I have a sense of security. Therefore, I frequently conduct self -test to confirm the fetal life signs - Carefully wipe the private parts with paper towels, and carefully check whether there are pink, brown secretions or blood on the paper towels.
This method is learned from an experienced pregnant mother on the Internet that it can timely discover the potential risks of abortion in time. Once I found bleeding in private parts, I had to rush to the hospital immediately.
However, unfortunate things happened after all. Before the next Wednesday, I was forced to go to the hospital for treatment -at 6 am on Monday, I discovered the symptoms of bleeding; at noon that day, I lost my child, and it slipped from my body. Unfortunately fall into the squat toilet. Its upper body is a transparent white velvet -shaped, and the lower body is a small dark red blood clot. The tail is sharp and shows a triangular shape.
Today, I have another understanding of the word "in" I have calculated before: it seems to be metaphorical to the word "Zi" in the word "pregnancy", which is blessed by the word "Nai" above, symbolizing the breeding and breeding of life and the birth of life. Breaking out. However, the word "soil" in the word "in" is not fully protected, which may mean that I have not been able to protect my children and finally turn it into dust.