There is a saying "Tolerating is a blessing", in human relations if everyone knows how to compromise a little, the relationship between both sides will be much better. However, not every time you should tolerate, here are 3 types of things that you must not tolerate and must resist appropriately. Otherwise, you will never be able to hold your head up in life.
1. Bearing the sins of others
Life is not easy to achieve happiness. Do not sacrifice your own happiness by trying to please others. This kind of loss may often occur in the workplace, especially with young people who have just stepped into society, inexperienced and easily deceived. They may have to bear the sins of their predecessors or superiors, sometimes the mistakes have nothing to do with them, but the responsibility still falls on them. When the boss often asks you to work overtime on weekends by notifying you at the last minute, and every time you nod in agreement even though you already have plans with your family for the weekend.
As a result, your Saturday passes by in frustration and annoyance with a long list of reports. You order an expensive dish at a restaurant but when the server brings out an overcooked steak and asks if everything is okay, you reply that everything is fine even though you can't hide your disappointed face when looking at the burnt piece of meat. You want to join a martial arts class but are afraid that your wife will not be happy if you are away from home for 1 or 2 hours on the weekend, so you don't even bother to mention it to her. The neighbors' beloved dog barks all night, causing you to suffer from severe sleep deprivation the next day. Instead of giving direct feedback to them, you only talk behind their backs to a few friends on Facebook.
On the journey to become more decisive, knowing how to say no is your best friend, practice saying no more often. If the other person's request conflicts with your personal boundaries, say no, if your schedule is already full, say no, thank you. You don't have to be rude to do that, you can firmly refuse while still being polite and considerate. Although it is difficult to avoid all losses in life, you must try your best to avoid bearing the responsibilities of others, because there are times when you cannot tolerate it anymore and you will have to face the consequences.
2. Impacting your dignity
If you suddenly notice that people are looking at you differently, then perhaps without your knowledge, your reputation has been damaged. People need to maintain their appearance even though damaging their reputation may not bring direct harm, in reality, it will greatly affect you, and if serious, it can become a stain that cannot be erased for a lifetime. Therefore, you must not tolerate temporarily for the sake of vanity and let your reputation be damaged, material benefits can be sacrificed, but reputation issues are absolutely non-negotiable.
3. Being exploited by others
Sometimes people suffer not because of their active choices but because they are being exploited by others. If you find that someone is intentionally manipulating you, you must not tolerate it because this type of loss can lead to extremely large losses, sometimes not just immediate losses. Furthermore, tolerating will not improve anything, the other person will only think you are foolish, kind, and easy to bully, and will continue to take advantage of you in the future. In order to have a peaceful life, one cannot lack patience, in this world, anything can happen, few people live according to their own wishes. Today may be fine, but tomorrow may bring only unsolvable problems.
For those who do not have patience, small and big things can make them angry, which can escalate small issues into big ones that cannot be resolved, ultimately leading to bitter consequences. On the other hand, those who have patience, adjust their temperament, receive peace and calmness to objectively and soberly assess the situation.
Why do we have to be patient?
From ancient times until now, there have been countless sayings left by our ancestors wanting to teach us the benefits of patience. Enduring a little calm sea, stepping back in a wide sea, or like patience is a golden statue, those who endure life will be more glorious. Patience is not only a virtue, it is also willpower, intelligence, an expression of a strong inner self, some people are spoken ill of behind their backs, whether it is true or false, they explode in anger, stay angry for days just hoping to find an opportunity for revenge against those who have set traps for themselves.
To outsiders, they may seem to live straightforwardly without suffering any losses, but in reality, they are making it difficult for themselves by holding grudges, losing more than gaining while the matter does not even concern them. Behaving patiently towards everyone around, everything that happens is a reminder and self-cultivation for oneself, when faced with unreasonable people, not arguing pointlessly with them proves that you understand reason, know how to treat others, and become a mature and confident person.
However, patience is not always omnipotent, there are situations in life that will require you to respond directly. Everything can be tolerated except for the following 2 cases. If you dare not resist, you become weak, lose personal principles, and lose the true meaning of patience.
1. Someone bullies or harasses loved ones around you
We are all normal people in normal life, facing extremely normal things that happen every day. However, if one day our parents or siblings are suddenly bullied by ruthless and wicked people for no reason. You must tell yourself not to tolerate anymore. If faced with such a situation where you see your loved ones being bullied and you just remain silent to let everything pass quickly, that is a useless person, only giving up their own dignity.
No matter what happens, the minimum dignity of oneself must be to protect the safety of one's family and loved ones, that is something everyone must have if they want to live upright and confidently in life. The dignity of each individual, each family, each nation, and the homeland is equally important. When faced with evil people, with malicious intentions to harm it, we must be vigilant and apply various methods and tactics to preserve this sacred value.
2. When seeing the elderly, children, and women being bullied by others
Every family is made up of factors such as the elderly, children, and women. We ourselves do not allow others to bully them in any way, so do those around us have the same mentality, if our parents or wives and children are treated badly by bad people on the street, and no one steps up to help, how would you feel. Put yourself in that situation and think, can we accept it? In any case, the elderly, children, and women are the three groups most vulnerable to harm because they do not have enough strength to defend themselves, so they are easily preyed upon by bullies. If you witness such a scene and hesitate to intervene in other people's affairs, you are becoming a weak person.
However, instead of blindly acting heroically, be vigilant, observe the situation and make the most appropriate decisions. In front of a group of people with weapons, do not rush in like a hero and risk your life. Do not put your good intentions into useless actions to suffer bodily harm. Although present and yielding is a good virtue, excessive yielding will become indulgence, allowing the bad guys to demand more and more. Therefore, one must have boundaries, when necessary, be firm, only by protecting one's own interests will you not suffer useless losses.