After my uncle learned that my salary at the construction site in Zibo was only a mere three hundred yuan, he said, "Going all the way to such a far place for this little salary, you might as well work in the county." After greeting some acquaintances, my uncle decided to let me work at the meat processing factory in the county and repeatedly told me not to be afraid of dirty work.
Although I was not very satisfied with this job either, I did not refuse, thinking that as long as there was work to do, it would be fine. However, since I returned home, there has been no further news, and I did not go to my uncle's house to inquire about it, so it ended up unresolved.
I originally thought this matter would just pass. One time, my grandmother started criticizing me over a trivial matter and casually mentioned, "Your uncle said you have no ability; you're just not cut out for being a worker."
My grandmother's words shocked me greatly because, in my impression, my uncle could not possibly say such things. Unexpectedly, my grandmother even swore to the heavens that she was not lying. To clarify this matter, I need to explain the family relationships.
The man my aunt married happens to be my uncle's brother-in-law, so my uncle often takes care of my aunt's cousin. One time, my grandmother went to stay at my aunt's house for a few days and happened to run into my uncle, so they met. My uncle found a job for the cousin, and my grandmother took the opportunity to say, "Why not find a job for Xiao Wei too?"
Then, according to my grandmother's description, when my uncle heard this, he snorted disdainfully, implying that I was not that kind of material. My grandmother probably felt very embarrassed, and when she came back, she scolded me without holding back.
I said my uncle could not possibly say such things. My grandmother became emotional and said that if she was lying, she would be struck by lightning, and that people just looked down on me.
I was also very speechless about this matter. Perhaps what my grandmother said was true; if the other party really intended to find me a job, they should have come over. Just because I did not go later does not mean this matter did not happen.
At that time, my mother had already been divorced from my father for many years, and my uncle's family treated me differently, probably for this reason. Although they still considered me their nephew, there might be a sense of estrangement deep down. I am not saying this without reason. I remember when my third aunt died from drinking pesticide due to trivial life matters, someone came to mourn, so I went to my third uncle's house to attend the funeral. At that time, my maternal grandmother was also there, and she specifically pulled me into a quiet room to emphasize that her daughter was already divorced, and according to reason, I belonged to the outer family, so I could come or not come. The implication was that my presence was unwelcome.
My maternal grandmother also said that her daughter married another man, and he was the legitimate one, while my brother was also legitimate. Hearing such remarks at that time shocked me; this was not something a maternal grandmother should say to me.
However, thinking about it later, since my maternal grandmother said this, others probably had the same view, but they just did not say it out loud. They did not show excessive sadness over my third aunt's death, as if they were just handling a procedural event, which made me feel a bit awkward. To be honest, when my third aunt was alive, she was the least class-conscious person. Although their family was relatively poorer, I never felt treated differently when I went to their house; they would serve me whatever they ate. Even though I was just a child, I could feel that sincere attitude. I just did not understand why she could not think straight and ended up drinking pesticide to death.
Back to my uncle. My uncle is a person who cares a lot about face, which is very similar to my mother. I respect him; at least he did not show any contempt for me when we were face to face.
I remember when my mother had just divorced, she sent some new clothes through my maternal grandfather. These new clothes were bought by my mother, probably to fill that little sense of guilt, after all, she had deceived me by saying she would come back.
One day, someone from my aunt's village came to visit our village and told me, "Your uncle treats you really well; he said he bought you new clothes."
I felt very puzzled by her words and said truthfully, "My uncle did give me some clothes and pants in the past, but they were all his old clothes. As for the new clothes, my mother bought them and had my maternal grandfather bring them over."
That cousin looked incredulous upon hearing this. It is said that later my uncle scolded her for saying he bought me new clothes, feeling very embarrassed, and he never mentioned buying clothes again.
Of course, I did not blame my uncle for this; caring about face is his nature, but his character is not bad. Whether or not he actually helped me, he did have that intention; it’s just that many things might not be within his control.
My father is uneducated, and since my mother has divorced, they look down on my father even more. Whenever there is work in the fields, my aunt and second aunt would think of asking my father for help. So this process inevitably involved my uncle's wife and others.
Once, my father went to help my aunt with farm work and encountered my uncle's wife. As a result, my uncle's wife and her brother mocked my father, with sharp and bitter words, making my father feel very embarrassed. However, my father still finished helping with the work and did not eat at their house, returning home in the evening.
After all, he felt wronged, and when he got home, he cried to my grandmother, snot and tears. My grandmother was very angry upon hearing this and scolded my father, saying, "Since they look down on you so much, why did you still finish the work for them? You could have just come back!"
Of course, my grandmother has always held a grudge about this matter. When she saw my uncle again, she did not give him a good face and scolded him in front of so many people in their village, while my uncle could only hide, as he was no match for my grandmother in a quarrel.
As time passed, I gradually understood why my parents ended up divorced. Although my mother repeatedly said it was because the family was poor and because my father treated her badly, for my uneducated father, my mother only saw her family and did not give my father enough face and respect. Whenever there was a problem, regardless of whether her family was right, she would first blame my father, and over time, it would lead to estrangement between them.
I am someone who helps reason over kinship and deeply understand how harmful it can be to help kinship over reason to those closest to you. Once, my mother tore my test paper without permission, and when my father just reminded her, she became furious. The reason was that tearing the test paper was to use it for writing something for her family, and then my mother became relentless, even hitting my father with a rattan stick, leading to a situation where my father could no longer endure, and they ended up fighting.
In fact, for me, tearing the test paper at that time was not a big deal, but after my father said it, I felt wronged because my mother did not ask me before doing it. I started crying. When they fought, I was very scared, and while crying, I ended up laughing. I did not know why I laughed; I just couldn't help it, maybe it was due to excessive shock. However, my mother never understood my behavior, thinking I was happy they were fighting. It was my brother's cries that comforted her, making her think he was crying out of concern for her.Later, my mother's green dress was torn open with a long cut on the back, and she indiscriminately accused me of being the one who played a prank, while in fact, I did not do it. As for who did it, I can assure you it was neither me nor my father, but she stubbornly believed it was me.